Christmas
is just around the corner so it's time for me to share some gift ideas for
those special men in your life! Buying gifts for men is not nearly as
complicated as it is for women. Follow these rules and you should have no problems.
Rule #1: If you are really,
really broke, buy him anything for his car. A 99-cent ice scraper, a small
bottle of deicer or something to hang from his rear view mirror. Men love gifts
for their cars.
Rule #2: Do not buy men socks.
Do not buy men ties and never buy men bathrobes. If God had wanted men to wear
bathrobes, he wouldn't have invented Jockey shorts.
Rule #3: You can buy men new
remote controls to replace the ones they have worn out. If you have a lot of
money buy your man a big-screen TV with the little picture in the corner. Watch
him go wild as he flips, and flips, and flips.
Rule #6: Do not buy any man
industrial-sized canisters of after shave or deodorant. We do not stink - we
are earthy.
Rule #4: Buy men label makers.
Almost as good as cordless drills. Within a couple of weeks there will be
labels absolutely everywhere. "Socks. Shorts. Cups. Saucers. Door. Lock.
Sink." You get the idea. No one knows why.
Rule #5: Never buy a man
anything that says "some assembly required" on the box. It will ruin
his Special Day and he will always have parts left over.
Rule #6: Men enjoy danger.
That's why they never cook - but they will barbecue. Get him a monster barbecue
with a 100-pound propane tank. Tell him the gas line leaks. "Oh the
thrill! The challenge! Who wants a hamburger?"
Rule #7: Tickets to a
professional sports game (any team within 300 miles) are a smart gift. However,
he will not appreciate tickets to "A Retrospective of 19th Century
Quilts."
Rule #8: Men love chainsaws.
Never, ever, buy a man you love a chainsaw. If you don't know why - please
refer to Rule #4 and what happens when he gets a label maker.
Rule #9: It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminum extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It must be an extension ladder.
Rule #9: It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or an aluminum extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It must be an extension ladder.
Rule #10: Rope. Men love rope.
It takes us back to our cowboy origins, or at least The Boy Scouts. Nothing
says love like a hundred feet of 3/8" manilla rope.
Rule #11: Buy your man Duct
Tape. This is a man's most universal repair tool. All men know, if you can't
fix it, duct it. (Adopted from http://mymerrychristmas.com)
